Under Awkward Stars:

The 20th was very quiet in camp until after dinner, when orders were given to prepare for mounted inspection. At half-past one the battery was hitched up and pulled out from the breastworks to a level field to the right and rear of our camp, where it went into park and then into battery with the cannoneers at their posts . About two o ' clock p. M. Captain Arnold, of Battery A, First Rhode Island Light Artillery, commanding artillery brigade, accompanied by his staff and First Lieut. T. F. Brown, passed around and through the battery on an inspection, asking questions of both drivers and cannoneers. At the conclusion of the inspection the battery was dismissed and ordered back to quarters, upon reaching which the men could no longer restrain their mirth, but burst out with a hearty laugh at what had transpired in one of the detachments during the inspection. To explain the cause we will start from the beginning:

When the order to prepare for inspection was given we knew there were to be no field movements nor drill at the manual of the piece, only to take position in battery and cannoneers at posts fully equipped as for action. Upon the issuing of these orders to a battery there commenced a scene of great activity about camp ; uniforms were brushed and cleaned, boots blacked, sabres and scabbards brightened, gun and caisson equipments put into their proper places, harnesses overhauled, and everything put into as good shape as c i rcumstances would allow. The battery, at this time, happened to be short of cannoneers, required to fill all the posts of the gun detachments, on account of many being detailed for extra work ; those on guard were not required to attend the inspections nor the supernumeraries, which included the cooks, those caring for extra horses, drivers of the battery wagons and forge, and officers * servants. There were two or three men in the battery who, unfortunately, must have been born under an “Awkward star, " They had been drilled and drilled, but all to no purpose, for, after months of training and service, the only occasion upon which they equaled their comrades was when they drew their pay and rations. They were, however, kept in the battery with the supernumeraries because they had to be somewhere. A first class cannoneer had to be cool, intelligent, keen, and quick to understand, also being able to perform the duties of two or more posts at the gun, as was often necessary when in action. A slow, awkward person should hold no place in a gun detachment of light artillery ; he could better find his level in the infantry where in action they worked more individually, and, after a manner, each was a power in himself and any awkwardness would not materially interfere with the working of his comrades. On the contrary a gun detachment of artillery was like a machine. No one worked individually but all in unison and with the precision of clock-work, every man on time and in time ; one mistake or awkward movemen t would cause confusion and tend to dire results. An observer unacquainted with the fine points of artillery drill, but aware of the unity of action required, would naturally suppose that, when in action, if one or two men were suddenly disabled it would cause confusion and retard its working ; but such was not the case, provision was made for casualties but none for mistakes or blunders. In drilling the men were taught to work at " reduced numbers. " Each man in position was known by a number when on drill or in action, and not by name, as: No. 1, who rams home the cartridge; No. 2, who inserts the cartridge, and so on ; each number had a certain part to perform.

When cannoneers were killed or disabled their duties were immediately assumed by the survivors ; and by their increased activity the gun was served with apparently the same regularity and precision as before. Considering tha t there were to be no drill or field movements during this inspection, the awkward men were assigned to gun detachments for the occasion as before stated. When ready the inspector, a smart appearing artillery officer " dressed in his Sunday best, " started on the round of inspection examining critically ever y man, gun, carriage, horse, and all equipments, etc. At times the inspector would stop suddenly at a gun and, placing his hand on some part, would inquire of a cannoneer, calling by number, ” What is this ? " Every part of a gun or carriage has a name, for instance the gun has the bore, muzzle, face of muzzle, muzzle band, swell at muzzle, neck, chace, trunions, reenforce, vent, breach, cascable, neck of cascable, knob of cascable, etc. The men were supposed to answe r promptly any questions asked. The inspector passed slowly along when suddenly he stopped, and, placing his hand on the face of the gun, said : (t No. 2, w-hat is this? " No. 2 looked at the officer and then at the gun but did not reply, (He was one of the supernumeraries.) The inspector sharply repeated the question. No. 2, now realizing that he must answer, hesitatingly replied : " The end of the gun, sir. " This answer staggered the officer, who, giving one glance at No. 2, appeared to take in the situation ; he then passed quickly to the rear of the gun where stood No. 4, a sharp, quick-witted, rollicking Irishman, who was well posted and could answer correctly any question pertaining to - his duty. The inspector placed his hand on the knob of the cascable, the extreme rear end of the gun, and said: " No. 4, what is this?" Quick as a flash came the reply, (t The other end, sir! " This answer paralyzed the inspector, who, followed by the other officers, quickly left the gun as if in fear it, as well as themselves, would explode. A few moments later the battery was dismissed and the men returned to their quarters to give vent to their pent up laughter.